john amato

It’s Christmas season again. And to me, it’s the best movie season of the year. I can’t imagine a December without the McCallister’s or the McClane’s. It would be like Thanksgiving without a turkey. And that’s just not right.

To help you enjoy your holiday season to the fullest, I’ve decided to compile a list of my favorite Christmas movies (they need to make this a box set). So get comfy in your “Rosita” and warm up next to Stevie as the cold settles in this winter.

1. Home Alone
Home Alone is the Christmas Classic of my childhood. Nothing beats it as far as I’m concerned. I remember the winter that it came out, the parents tried to do something special for the us kids and took us to see it at the theatre. And when you have four kids, it’s quite expensive to pay for 6 tickets and snacks. Well we got to the theatre and found out the movie was sold out and we had to go home. We appreciated the effort nonetheless.

What else makes Home Alone so special?

• It takes place in Chicago. Everyone loves Chicago, especially Carney. Yep, that Jason Carney, the one who bares such a striking resemblance to Kevin’s most critical relative, Buzz.
• The McCallister’s house, the Silver Tuna, is located on Lincoln Avenue. The same Lincoln Avenue that the Jim Amato’s live on.
• When Kevin gets married, he’s living alone.
• Uncle Frank went to St. Francis
• The McCallister’s vacay to Paris. Paris is sweet.
• John Candy is in a polka band.

In short, the movie is so good, last week in LA, Carney, Teapot, and I stayed inside all day in perfect weather to lay and watch Kevin defend his house from the Wet Bandits…twice.

2. Elf
Elf is a spectacular movie. So much so that Dirty still answers his phone, “Mark the Dirty, what’s your favorite color.”

Elf is so special because it’s funny for all ages, at least I think so, and that’s something you don’t see much anymore. Will Ferrell is perfect in the role of Buddy, the human raised by elves. His childlike exuberance sets this one apart.

Don’t forget the Code of the Elves:

1. Treat Every Day Like Christmas.
2. There’s Room For Everyone on the Nice List.
3. The Best Way to Spread Christmas Cheer is Singing Loud for All to Hear.

or the four major food groups:

1. Candy
2. Candy Canes
3. Candy Corn
4. Syrup

3. Die Hard
Really, the Christmas season shouldn’t have caught me by surprise like it did. All the signs were there, I just missed them: the weather getting colder, Thanksgiving, Cosby sweaters, Coop’s winter weight, and stuff like that. But the biggest signal I missed was that Die Hard was being shown repeatedly on movie channels.

Now I know what you’re thinking, “Die Hard? A Christmas movie? Nice try.” Well not so fast my friend, Die Hard is a purebred Christmas movie. The whole plot is centered around John McClane going to LA to visit his wife Holly for the holidays. He goes straight from the airport to Holly’s work Christmas party.

Man, and this movie is a classic beyond its Christmas theme. It’s Bruce Willis’ breakout role. What was he doing before this? Comedy? Would we know him without Die Hard? I don’t think so.

Die Hard has soo many great characters and lines. Willis is the typical invincible NYC tough guy cop a la John Corey. And Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber is your stereotypical Eastern European terrorist.

“Twelve terrorists. One cop. The odds are against John McClane…That’s just the way he likes it.”

4. Bad(der) Santa

Ah yes, once again we move to another Carney Classic. The first time I watched this was with Annie and frankly, we weren’t sure if we should be crying because it was so offensive or because it was so funny. Big J helped me understand that it really is legendary.

Billy Bob pulls through with his biggest performance outside of Monster’s Ball (but that was for entirely different reasons). His drunk and disorderly version of Santa is funny every time you watch it – if you’re a little open minded that is. The supporting cast comes out in full force in this one too. The chick from Gilmore Girls is scandalous, the fat kid knows the shit happens when you party naked, John Ritter is unbelievable in his final movie and Bernie Mac pulls through as well.

5. Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

Why Home Alone 2: Lost in New York? Because it’s the sequel to the greatest Christmas movie ever and that’s all you really need to be to find yourself on this list.

Lost in New York is actually a very fine movie in its own right. The Wet Bandits escape and become the Sticky Bandits (Marv sure is a clever dude), Kevin finds himself in NYC instead of Florida, the TalkBoy is introduced to consumer America, and Buzz plays the drums on Kevin’s head at the Christmas recital.

6. A Christmas Story

A Christmas Story was given to me last year by the Healy’s. For a couple weeks last January when I didn’t have any friends in Paris, it was the only thing I had to do in my apartment. I’d go to work, eat, run and watch A Christmas Story. Good times.

But beyond being my only companion last winter, A Christmas Story has a lot going for it. I knew the quote “you’ll shoot your eye out” before ever watching the movie. There’s the major “Fra-gee-lay” award that Mr. Parker gets which turns out to be a leg lamp and Flick’s tongue freezes to the pole. The adult Ralphie narrator adds a lot of humor to the story too.

7. Die Hard 2: Die Harder

The odds were against John McClane again, but that’s just the way he likes it.

This isn’t the greatest Die Hard, the original is better and With a Vengance is big time with Samuel L. even though it’s not a Christmas movie. But John McLane on Christmas part deux, ‘nuff said.